Why am I here? Who is governing my life? Is there somebody out there who is aware of the changes I am bringing about in my life? Does the power to bring about a change, whether good or bad rests with me or is it premeditated by someone else in the higher sphere. Some say, that it is only us who can change the course of our life. If it is so, then why do we depend on a higher force? If you do good, you get benefits, if you do bad, you suffer right here on earth. We make our own heaven and hell. But we also turn to Him, when we are stuck. Atleast I do.
Of late, I have been having one-sided conversations with Him. He has become silent of late. I wonder is it because I don't let Him speak, or has He become tired of listening to me. Father, as I address Him, is really the most kindest being. I vaguely recall His calm demeanour. He has the most softest, calming face with the whitest, silvery beard. He is ever smiling at my antics, He is not judgemental at all. When I fight with Him, or share my feelings with Him, I see He just looks at me with amazement. When I need answers, sometimes, all of a sudden, I hear a voice that comes from my heart. Or at times, when i cry, I can sense somebody consoling me. Do I sound crazy? I hope not. I do believe there are angels who protect and look over us.
At the moment, I am undergoing an emotional turmoil of sorts. I asked the universe to send me something, and it did send that thing, but the confusion is whether it will be mine forever. Too much emotional stress and confusion makes me restless. I am relying on Father to come to my rescue. Please do... like you always have. Take care of me and make me a stronger person.
Sometimes, I feel my mission is to find true love. I don't know for sure if I will find it, but again, I read somewhere "Ask and you shall receive". (i am not sure if i read this in the Bible). Let's hope my search ends soon and I move on to something else in life. :)
Cheers!!
